anger and madness

I turned into the devil yesterday. That's why there was no blog printed either.

I got up and took some pics and moved them into a new file on my laptop. Husband spotted me doing this, deleted my new file and moved them into 'Janey's pics' without asking me if that was what I wanted.

No! it fucking was not what I wanted, I went mental and screamed 'You are trying to control my life you bastard' and went to bed for the rest of the day. When he tried to talk to me I decided to tell him I wanted a divorce and the sooner he got used to that idea the better. I was justified, he had moved my pictures to a new file without my consent.

As I explained this hineous crime to Ashley she smiled and said "Yes, that's clearly akin to murder, leave the organised wierdo" She looked at me as if I was in need of Prozac.

I forced myself back to sleep till my head hurt through sleeping with my teeth gnashing.

'I may have over reacted a bit' I told him this morning.

It took me two hours to admit I am a psycho and am sorry.

The book arrives on Wednesday and am excited but will probably throw another childish strop tonight! I need Dr Tanya the child psycologist to come and 'time out' my behaviour.

The gig on Saturday night went amazingly well, Billy Bonkers had a good crowd in and they laughed in all the right places, I was trying out new material for my forth coming Edinburgh show 'Janey Godley is Innocent'.

Right now after all my nasty behaviour----I feel guilty.

I think husband is packing and may well run away and take his child with him in case I turn into wolverine snappy woman again.