Sex and baked goods

I do seriously wonder if about men. Is it every time they have sex and sperm leaves their body; do they need to immediately fill that gap with baked goods?

I am not joking here, husband leapt out of our bed at 4am… (It was a late night session…when does he slow down? I am getting very old…to old for all this late night exercise) and ran to the kitchen to eat ham toasties. Oh God. I hope my step mum is NOT reading this…she will really stab me with a knitting needle for discussing sex again. Maybe she has a point.

I love his ham toasties, but then I soon fell asleep into the Village of the Damned dream. I was right grumpy cow this morning, having dealt with burnt bodies, dead babies and blood all night in my nightmares -what do you expect?

I need to get my intelligent head on, I have so much to organise this week.
I am being filmed on BBC next week, I need to organise books to be sold at Underbelly venue throughout Fringe, need to finalise details for flat in Edinburgh, get posters and flyers printed, all monies owed to me brought in and fuck knows what else to be honest….my brain is dead.

Got told I had upset some members of my in law’s family and other people mentioned in the book, makes me feel odd and truly upset as I know the book was very intrusive of people’s lives, but I had to tell the truth as I saw it. So I am sorry to those who read this and then tell others what it said. It’s like apologising by proxy!

I know that ‘Someone connected to my husbands family ’ reads this BLOG and then tells ‘someone’ and they tell ‘someone’ else and the family (my husbands’ family) then get told…I mean fuck sake guys just get the net and stop the Chinese whispers, read the book and the BLOG first hand, that’s how rumours start!

So there we have it, maybe I should have written my book from all of their perspectives….can you imagine? Seven versions of one story? That would be like the Bible! Even it has discrepancies in it!

Life goes on and I am sure I do believe in what goes around comes around…

I went shopping with Ashley today as she needed three skirts.

We actually bought
4 skirts
3 pairs of trousers
4 tops
1 jacket
2 pairs of socks

My Visa bill will be hard to face…..oh have you had that fake email from PAYPAL? I did….
It explains how you paid £1,400 for two maxi Vibrators and it will be charged to your PAYPAL account. Well I quickly called VISA and they told me straight off it was a hoax…Shit, I really was looking forward to getting my Double Delight Maxi petrol powered turbo vibrator…at least it doesn’t need baked goods after a session. (Sorry Mum)