My Knickers on EBAY!

My daugter Ashley cornered me yesterday when I got home...I am all exhausted and she shoves a pair of knickers into my hand and black ink marker and said "Sign these whilst I take a picture"...so I did. I then went into unpack my things.

Eventually when my brain worked properly I asked her "Why did you take a photo of me signing knickers?"

Ashley said " Well I am hoping your book will make you more famous and I am selling your pants on EBAY"

I am shocked. I am hoping she is joking and I am hoping the knickers she has belonging to me are sparkling and clean. The last thing I want is for some weirdo to have a pair of my old pants with dodgy stains on....

Well today in Scotland is the offical hotest day on the year. I watched loads of mad Scots walk about burnt red...so many people will lie in bed tonight and feel the hot skin on their back start to blister..USE SUNSCREEN!

You always know its hot in Glasgow because the next day newspapers report of two people who died in their garden...fucking hell, when will folk realise that the BIG HOT ball in the sky is made of BURNING FLAMES?

We went to the beach for a wee while and it was way too hot to even sit on the coast..we are all at home..half naked clustered around a fan....I would kill for snow right now.

I am getting my show prepared for my previews this weekend in London, my new show for the Edinburgh Fringe is called

"Janey Godley is Innocent".

Well hope it is funny as I have press etc coming to see the show. Cant change the title now as I have posters etc all made and ready to go and my daughter is doing my PR this year, no reason to spend 3 grand on someone else talking about me when she can do it perfectly well and is in fact very good at PR. She has a lot of experience in that field and has managed to get big audiences into shows every year for other companies that hired her, for me she will work for love.

I hope...or maybe I can pay her in used underwear to sell on EBAY?