Monday, October 10, 2005


It has now rained for exactly 12 hours here in Glasgow. I am waiting on Ashley coming home from Uni and I know she will be soaked through and that drives me mad…like me, she never wears a heavy coat and NEVER carries a brolly.
I went shopping today to buy something nice to appear on BBC Scotland’s Craig Hill show, I settled on a red long cardi-thing, it looks warm and nice and may hide the fattest ass on television that week, with the exception of the fat chic on Good Morning breakfast show.
If you are in Glasgow and want to be part of the audience click on this link HERE

I seriously need to adapt myself to a crack habit to shed the lard, I am crap at dieting, and so serious measures are required. I just hate the thought of sitting watching breakfast TV whilst freebasing cocaine. It’s not really an ‘Autumn’ look, yes I know it’s a kinda Chelsea/Kings Rd Kate Moss vibe…but I can’t really get away with it. It will probably cost me ten grand in drugs and ten grand on rehab…not a fucking good idea eh?

The fashion shops are full of thick tweed suits, starched white shirts and Victorian looking fitted jackets…now on the very young and very thin that look is awesome finished off with a pair of dark copper leather knee high boots…on me I look like a fat tweedy Miss Marple in kinky boots. So freebase cocaine here I come…or maybe I can just quit chocolate and save myself a lot of cash and prospective prostitution?

I am looking forward to performing at the M74 JAM, it’s a night of protest and stuff and I will be reading from my book, here is a link to the website HERE its not an organisation that makes boiled fruit preserves whilst listening to the music of the seventies! Try it.

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