Thursday, January 19, 2006

Me and Christian Slater…

Yes, I know what a title! I was in Soho last night meeting Noel (comedy promoter and friend) outside the Groucho club in Dean Street. As I was waiting, a big armoured Limo drew up at the kerb and out came Allen Carr and Justin (two comics who have a TV show currently) I know Allen quite well and he said “Hello Janey” I smiled back and said “hi” they were joined by Christian Slater who was taking part in some sketch for their TV show.

Anyway, the camera crew were all around and as I tried to get out of their way and pass them big cars started rearing up on the pavement, there were wires and big bulky camera’s and people and I couldn’t get through them.
“Can you move please” said the burly camera man.

I was trying to get out of the wee circle they had created, I understand television and the precarious nature of doing shots in a street, but the street is so narrow and cars and taxis were almost on top of us and the only way for me to get out of the shot was to walk on the road. I stepped onto the road and a big fuck off van blasted its horn and almost squashed me, so I hopped into the pavement again.

“You are still in the shot darling” the patient camera man said.
“I am sorry; I know what you are saying but fucksake man I am not dying under a van for the show!” I blurted out as I was now ducking and practically crawling under Christian Slater’s legs to get to the back of the pavement, “I don’t want to fuck up your camera work, but I don’t want to die on the streets of Soho”
They laughed and waited till I was safely past them, Allen gave me a wave and I was off.

What they don’t know is I am notoriously bad at crossing roads and really scared of the traffic; I have been hit by cars around 5 times in my life. Once I was so badly hurt when I was nine, it took almost a year to walk again properly and I do still limp sometimes. On that occasion I was wearing my brownie uniform and going to the club to attempt to gain my Road safety badge! The irony still hurts!

No comments: