Sleepless in Auckland

Yes we made the very fatal mistake of falling asleep at 5pm. I know!!! What fucking idiots we are, my daughter and I decided a wee nap would be good so I set my phone alarm for 7pm. I forgot in my haze of jetlag that my phone is on UK time and would not alarm me until Wednesday next week or something! What is wrong with me?
I was so flabby and jetlagged I could hardly function, I went into the closet and forgot why I was there, meanwhile Ashley was looking through her luggage and fell asleep with her head inside it!
That’s how tired we were, we woke up and Ashley heard people outside on the tennis court and said “How late do these people play tennis?” it was only 8pm, we had been asleep 3 hours and we just went straight back to sleepy land and woke at around 5am this morning. That’s ten hours of sleep time, we both had bizarre dreams! I dreamt I found a unicorn and slashed its throat and Ashley dreamt her dad had given an old Etch-A-Sketch and there was an automatic button that drew the Pope on it!
Weird? Yes!
So we got up and waited for the breakfast bar to open. We were both starved as we hadn’t eaten since the plane journey. We did find a biscuit in my bag and sat on the floor and shared it like we were two survivors of ‘Lost’.
I hate that programme, its second series is being shown in UK, I don’t understand how that big fat guy Hurley hasn’t lost any weight yet, or how a polar bear lives on that tropical island and doesn’t die in the heat? Who feeds it baby seals?
How come the women all look groomed and sleek, they have no straggly eyebrows, bushy arm pits and perfect skin, I look like a crack whore and I am living in a five star hotel?
The weather here in Auckland is horrific, I haven’t seen that much rain since the flood at Glastonbury last year, it’s like being back in Glasgow for fucksake.
I have three interviews today and stuff to organise, I have chatted with husband and manager John on Skype which is awesome, I love Skype.
Ashley is all bright eyed and bushy tailed, she is running around Auckland with her camera and we will have a live blog up soon on Livedigital that hosts all my media and I am sure it will also be on my webpage.
Have done my first live audio blog for Radio Café on BBC Radio Scotland, it gets broadcast next week on Tuesday 16th May.
I am so looking forward to my first gig tonight at Classic Comedy club in Auckland.
Speak soon….jetlag Janey.