Saturday, February 10, 2007

My Mammy…

I had a great time last night at East Kilbride Arts Centre, it was amazing.
The show sold out!
Loads of people who had come had already read my book and that totally stuns me that people are still reading my autobiography. I am very humbled.

I started talking about my mum; those who know me know that she was murdered in 1982.
When I was telling a really funny story about her I actually started to cry a bit, not terribly noticeable to be honest. I have the video clip here and its very funny trust me I was just emotional slightly when I remembered her face, and the audience can’t really tell.
I really miss her sometimes. My daughter is reaching 21 years old and that was the age I was when my mammy was killed.
I was so numb at the time and actually pretended that my mammy was still alive. This was a huge emotional mistake; I had to face my mammy’s death eventually.
I can’t imagine leaving Ashley behind at that age, to me she is still a baby and we are incredibly close.
I wish I had been that close to my mammy, I often wonder how she felt when she was fighting for her life that dark night she was thrown into the River Clyde.
I torture myself wondering if she lay there in dark injured and flailing till her life slowly ebbed away. We will never know. The police never made much of an effort to charge her killer. Peter was his name, he was her boyfriend and had previously been charged with trying to kill her two years earlier. She thought he would change if she was good to him.

I miss her…if you want you can view the clip here
YouTube My Mammy clip

I am going to sit and watch TV with Ashley today, I love our Saturdays when I am not out of Glasgow. We both lie on the sofa and click through chart shows, films and our favourite TV shows.
I am lucky to still have this time with her and trust me I know that!

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