I woke up in a cold sweat worried sick that my play The Point of Yes would completely fall out of my head just as the show opened today in Assembly Rooms yesterday. Husband walked me up to the venue, laughing at my shaky scared knees tremble, as I slipped and tripped over the evil cobble stones in Edinburgh. “You will be fine, you know the script” he laughed as he walked behind me.
I reached the High Street and saw the whole of the worlds press gathered outside Supreme Court ready for the verdict on the Tommy Sheridan Libel case that is being and fought there, the verdict was due. Tommy was taking the newspaper The News of the World to court over their allegations of him being involved with sex parties and threesomes (how unusual for a politician to get caught up in that shit eh?)
Anyway, shaky legs disappeared and I calmly walked up to the microphone and faced the barrage of cameras. I held up my flier and shouted out
“Ok everyone listen up… news of a threesome, I am doing three shows a day”
The journalists all laughed, and then I launched into some comedy.
“Janey do you think Tommy will win his case?” A man from ITN News shouted out.
“Yes, he is innocent all the way, I know him and he never tried to fuck me, so therefore they are all liars!” I quipped back.
The crowd cheered and I carried on doing my stuff. Policemen gathered round, court officials hung out of windows, camera men vied for better positions and I laughed my ass off at the thought of forty flyer’s standing on the Royal Mile, trying to get attention and here was a huge collection of the International Press waiting for a performer to arrive…that was me.
I told a few stories, plugged the shows, took a bow, enjoyed the applause and made my way to my opening of the play.
I stood backstage at the Assembly Room’s small theatre space and breathed slowly as I gathered my thoughts to get the script into my head. I heard the audience arrive, I heard them taking seats, I heard my intro music and stepped into the light.
It was great! I recalled the whole show and managed to get through it without fainting or forgetting huge chunks of script…everything went well!
Only two more shows to go.
After Point of Yes, I ran up to Bristo Square and Ashley and I did some stuff to camera for E4. Then we ran down to Underbelly and did the Square Street show. Again- all went well, Ashley and I sat with a nice journalist from
The Independent newspaper and chatted, he is interviewing me in the morning.
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