Friday, April 03, 2015
Friday, February 20, 2015
The Difference is Clear
My mammy Annie was a wee Glasgow working class woman, with a
lot of poverty and addiction problems. My problems today seem insurmountable so
I thought I would compare them to my mothers in the 60s/70s/80s
Janey 2015. I couldn't get my new Iphone to work today and
was utterly distraught, I thought I was going to have a nervous breakdown.
Annie 1960. Am pregnant again and the three I have got are
making me insane, never mind Valium has been invented and so has the Pill.
Janey 2015. I am too tired to wash my hair to do comedy for
20 minutes for a good wage.
Annie 1967. I am exhausted the four kids have chicken
pox....mmmm Valium is good, I feel shaky without it but have to do a 12 hours
shift in the box making factory.
Janey 2015. My husband is crap at hanging up the washing and
I wish he heated the car before he drove me to work.
Annie 1968. My husband is drunk again, no wages and the
doctor won't give me more Valium, we may have to borrow a can of soup off my
neighbour and share it between the kids.
Janey 2015. I can't be arsed trying to figure out what to
wear tonight and with what shoes?
Annie 1968. The kids have all grown out of or destroyed their
one pair of shoes each, I will have to shove lino inside them to cover up the
holes. I will wear wellington ankle boots till next pay day.
Janey 2015. Some guy was really sexist on facebook today, I
want him barred off facebook.
Annie 1969. The boss at work felt my breasts again, better
not say anything in case my husband gets annoyed or I get sacked. Just try and
cover my boobs up more, my own stupid fault.
Janey 2015. My new laptop arrived, how do I work this, it takes so long to set it up.
Annie 1970. The electricity has been disconnected, I never
paid it...am feeling really bad about the amount of Valium am taking, but it
helps me block it all out.
Janey 2015. I need to check my bank account online.
Annie 1971. I need to beg money from my family, the kids
need new school uniforms.
Janey 2015. Bloody Itunes gave me U2 whether I wanted it or
not I hate U2.
Annie 1980. I hate U2 what happened to music?
Janey 2015. Might go a wee holiday this year.
Annie 1892. My new boyfriend is scaring me.
Annie Currie died in 1982 at the hands of her boyfriend.
Janey 2015. I miss my mammy.
Labels:
60s,
annie currie,
Glasgow,
Janey Godley,
poverty,
women
Sunday, January 04, 2015
Comedy for kids.
Not many
people would assume it was my bag, but I often do Kids Comedy show at The Stand Comedy Club Glasgow.
I can imagine as you are reading this and if you know me, you might be
thinking things like "Did you swear?" of course I didn't.
I love
doing comedy for kids. It can be tough as some kids don't understand that they
have to pay attention or maybe they are used to taking over a room with a story
and then feel awkward as other kids don't find them as interesting as their own parents probably do.
One Sunday
in at the start of the show a wee boy about nine years old kept chatting to me
and engaging in long diatribes about dinosaurs.
He couldn't get away from
dinosaurs. His mum looked uncomfortable and was trying to get him to sit quiet.
The other kids were getting annoyed and parents started looking over at him. He
didn't care, he had heaps to say about dinosaurs.
I managed to
get him on stage and to name every dinosaur he knew and I could act out it's
walking action. He was in heaps of wee giggles as I clearly didn't know what I
was doing and was just stomping about the stage making noises.
To calm him
down, I asked him if wanted to host the show with me. He took my hand and we
came to an agreement that he could only shout out dinosaur names when I got
stuck for material and he would take over.
The audience
laughed as he was really having trouble staying quiet and loved it when I would
shout "am stuck, give me a dinosaur" and all the kids would scream
with laughter at my interpretation.
The wee boy
sat with me as the other comics took the stage and he was fine, he was laughing
and keeping the dinosaur chat to a minimum.
He was
flushed with excitement after the show and his mum came over to tell me how
much he enjoyed it.
She explained that he had Aspergers and doesn't often talk
out loud or touch people and this was her first time with him at comedy.
She
told me it was wonderful to see him chat to someone and not get berated or
flustered. "To see him onstage holding your hand and laughing was just so
lovely" she said. I thanked her.
I explained
that he was good fun and that my husband has Aspergers and at that the wee guy
butted in and said "Does he know all the dinosaurs?"
I told him he
didn't but my husband was an expert on all things Ancient Rome. I got a quick
hug from him and he ran out the door.
When people
ask me what my best audience was I tell them it was a nine year old boy who
likes dinosaurs.
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